Procrastination Nation

Things that Robert is thinking about that keep him from accomplishing anything.

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Monday, December 15, 2003
Apres Capture, le Deluge
While Saddam Hussein's capture is cause for celebration in many circles, as a television fan and comedian, I can't say that I look forward to this evening, or the next several weeks, of lame Hussein jokes. Anticipate comparison to O.J. Simpson (rehashing that tired series of jokes), Queer Eye references, mugshot jokes of the Winona-Campbell-Nolte variety, plus a bunch of secondary material for bad hotel jokes. Maybe some Bad Santa references. If TV Funhouse were still on the air, I wouldn't mind a visit from Hussein to the detective agency of Kidder, Downey & Heche. Maybe they'll deliver an episode to SNL.

Was anybody else nauseated by Leslie Stahl's interview with Donald Rumsfeld? I'm sure the network censors were relieved that Rumsfeld was beamed in via satellite instead of in the room as they would have been forced to decide whether to broadcast a blowjob on national television. It seemed pretty tacky for her to giggle at the suggestion that maybe the U.S. would have been better off he had been caught dead instead of alive. I don't mind asking the question, I do mind her sounding like a giggly school girl. What, is she bucking to become CBS's version of Andrea Mitchell (a.k.a. Mrs. Greenspan)?

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