Things that Robert is thinking about that keep him from accomplishing anything.

 
Newest Pub
Greetings. I missed this on Monday, but my latest freelance piece, on barbecue, made it into The Tennessean. I apologize in advance for some of the disorganization (just a hazard of how the piece was originally designed when it wasn't intended as a coherent article), but even more for some goofy punchup work (some of what looks like it's intended to be funny is punchup from elsewhere).

I don't mind too much so long as I get paid. What worries me though is that somebody thought those jokes or humorous asides (e.g., "nasty for your innards") fit with my jokes (e.g., about toddlers and bbq accidents, the Atkins item). What are you gonna do, huh? Sometime soon (May or early June) I have another piece on sausage and hot dogs, so stay tuned.
posted by RSaunders at 5:03 PM ⇒ (0) comments

 
Back Again
Sorry, folks. I've been preoccupied with losing weight the past few weeks. The extra time on the treadmill has sapped so much energy, I can barely muster the strength to procrastinate, much less blog and procrastinate.

Anyway, here's the update: I've lost 21.5 pounds in the last...maybe 5 weeks. I forget exactly when I started, but I know I started at 253 or more pounds. (I didn't have what I considered an accurate scale, but I knew I was a little bigger than my heaviest when I was 252. So, I say that I was at least 253. It could've been more. I know, scary, even a 6'2".)

The secret? Walking 4 mi. on the treadmill roughly 5 days a week, and cutting back my eating to roughly 2-3 meals per day at what is roughly...1800 calories a day (with some limited reward days like a hot dog at a Predators game). I figure if a schmoe like Joe Esterhaus can walk 5 mi. a day after a lifetime of smoking and recent cancer, I can manage 4 mi. To pass the time, I watch some combo of Regis&Kelly, The View, and Ellen. This alone testifies to my endurance.

Actually, the funniest thing about the regimen has been watching these shows. Because the treadmill is so loud, I leave the sound off and use the closed captioning to read the shows. On top of the goofy spellings that you get, you also get a sense of how awful current popular music is, lyrically at least. Read the lyrics to an Alicia Keys song. It's pretty far from poetry, even if she has a good voice--I can't tell with the sound off, but she seems to be trying real damned hard, and the gals from the View like it.

My primary motivational tool has been growing out this ridiculous beard. I'm not quite in Johnny Damon territory, but I'm closer to Damon than to, say, Peter Garrett, the (now former) lead singer of Midnight Oil. When I get to my goal weight (which fluctuates every time I think about a "goal weight), I will shave it all off as the magical solution to those pesky "last 3 pounds." We'll see if it works over the long run, but for now it is working.
posted by RSaunders at 11:23 AM ⇒ (0) comments

 
So Much to Write, So Little Time
Greetings. I've got a lot to tell you about this past weekend, including a trip the Southern Pro Rodeo contest in Priceville, Ala. on Saturday night and Nashville's first-ever playoff victory today against Detroit. However, I'm working out the kinks in an article for my real job, so I'll have to wait until tomorrow to get those all down.

In the meantime, I'd like to point you to a Kerry-VP preview piece by Ron Brownstein of the LA Times. He adds some interesting names to the list (e.g., Richard Holbrooke, Sandy Berger), but it's not clear what votes they add. Interestingly, he leaves out the person I chose as my top contender, Louisiana's John Breaux.
posted by RSaunders at 6:27 PM ⇒ (0) comments

 
On Diversity
Here's a nicely written piece in this coming Sunday's New York Times Magazine on diversity in higher education. Take the time to register, it's worth it.
posted by RSaunders at 3:43 PM ⇒ (0) comments

 
Fighting Cancer Can Be Fun
More frequent ejaculations are associated with a decreased risk of prostate cancer. It's interesting that the copy writer leaped to the conclusion that sex was necessary. Excuse me a moment.......there, that's better. I'm feeling less cancerous already.

The statistician in me can't help but wonder what weird selection effects could explain the results. I wonder if the benefits are offset by an increased risk of arthritis.
posted by RSaunders at 4:17 PM ⇒ (0) comments

 
Procrastinator's Delight
Just flipping around the Late Show website and ran across Dave's collection of odd records. You'll giggle yourself silly.
posted by RSaunders at 2:46 PM ⇒ (0) comments

 
Nevermind
Seems I was too late for Wonderfalls. Kudos to Jed for the tip, even if I hate the news.
posted by RSaunders at 9:28 AM ⇒ (0) comments

 
What Is So Civil About These Civilians?
Last week the media reported about the ambush and killing of four American "civilians" in Fallujah. My question gets at the nature of the word civilian. The term traditionally means non-military personnel. The implication is that the person is a non-combatant.

Apparently, the media is either accepting the Bush administration's rhetorical line that civilian means anyone who is not in uniform or incredibly unsophisticated. But, if we privatize military and security services, are these people not part of the military? They're simply better paid than the people who wear the standard G.I.'s uniform.

Would a better term not be, "mercenary?" These are former U.S. soldiers who dropped out of the military to be "consultants" to security firms (or found them themselves) and be paid big money to take on specific jobs they found more desirable. I do not object to the principle of the government paying extra for their expertise to fill in specific gaps, although I believe it undermines the regular forces because talented troops will get their training and leave for more money. Kind of like college basketball players leaving for the NBA.

What I object to is the rhetorical implication of the term "civilian" that these people were blameless in some way. Just as I would never refer to somebody who drives a truck bomb into a crowd of people as a "civilian," I cannot refer to somebody who is paid by the US military to conduct military duties as a "civilian" simply because they're Americans. I'm sorry for them and their families, but they should have read the fine fucking print of the contract when they took the big paycheck.
posted by RSaunders at 12:30 PM ⇒ (0) comments

 
Yeah, Predators!
The Nashville Predators backed their way into the NHL playoffs yesterday with Edmonton's 5-2 loss to Vancouver, despite a 4-1 loss to St. Louis.

The good news in this is that I will get to see the Predators play the Red Wings (SUCK!) in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. The bad news is that I bought lower bowl tickets, which are like $60-$65 apiece. That was supposed to be my silver lining when they didn't make the playoffs. Oh, well, it would be nice to see those guys at least win a game in the series.

What will be interesting to see is how pro-Red Wing (SUCK!) the crowd is, since a big fraction of season ticket holders are Red Wing (SUCK!) fans who work at the Saturn plant in Spring Hill, Tenn. Not that this is unusual for the Nashville area. Vanderbilt football tickets are bought by Tennessee, Alabama, and Florida fans; Vanderbilt basketball tickets are bought by Kentucky and (to a lesser extent these days) Arkansas fans. We'll see what happens to the Titans when they suck.

But, I'm super excited for the Predators. YIPPEEE!
posted by RSaunders at 11:43 AM ⇒ (0) comments

 
It's All Fun and Games Until...
Read about the anger management class gone awry.
posted by RSaunders at 9:50 AM ⇒ (0) comments

 
More Plugging
I've added a link to a new web comic, Honor Among Slackers, that has been featured on the The Slant's site lately. Get in on the ground floor.
posted by RSaunders at 9:42 AM ⇒ (0) comments

 
Plugging Shows
While I'm plugging shows, give Wonderfalls a look. Thursday nights 9 ET/8 CT. It's cute and a lot of fun.
posted by RSaunders at 12:01 PM ⇒ (0) comments

 
Liberal Competition
Within the past 10 days NPR has given the boot to Morning Edition host Bob Edwards, his last day slated for May 1. They claim a desire to freshen up the show.

I wonder whether this is not a specific reaction or anticipatory change responding to the new Air America Radio network, the lefty radio network which debuted yesterday. I've got it on right now listening to Hillary talk to Franken.

Granted, they're different kinds of nets, with ME doing news and its direct competition being the super comedian Marc Maron, who used to host a couple of shows on Comedy Central back when Comedy Central showed standup acts like music videos. Ah, the good ole days. I need to start getting into work earlier so I can listen to Lizz Winstead, too, who competes in the late morning with ME. Lizz is the creator of The Daily Show and former host of Oxygen's parody talk show, Oh 2 Be!.

I am hopeful for the network, not because of its political bent, though that helps, but because it promises to be interesting. It has great people I like (and I haven't even mentioned Chuck D or Janeane Garofolo), and it promises to replace the role the Tony Kornheiser show played in my daily routine.

Speaking of Tony's departure: I believe he's leaving because ESPN needed a show that would run on NYC, LA, and all 3 hrs in Chicago and other larger markets. He can say that it is because of the tv demands, but the fact that he's talking about returning to the radio in the near future with a local and/or satellite show tells me that he's volunteering to leave rather than trash and burn the network. I would not be surprised to see TK fill a slot on the Air America network.
posted by RSaunders at 11:59 AM ⇒ (0) comments